I'm Gonna Whup Yo' Ass! by Saab Lofton

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I'm Gonna Whup Yo' Ass!
by Saab Lofton

"If you believe that the world is going to come to an end -- and perhaps any day now -- does it not drain one's motivation to improve life on earth while we're here?"
--Bill Maher, from the documentary, Religulous

Let me make this as clear as I can: If 2012 comes and goes; if that much vaunted Mayan Calendar runs out and nothing cataclysmic happens, I swear by all that is holy and sacred ...

... I will personally hunt down each and every last motherfucker who made such a big deal about how the end of the world was supposedly just around the corner ...

... and beat the fucking shit out of them. I'm soooo NOT joking here. Prison? Hell, I'm a black man in AmeriKKKa (note the triple K); the statistics dictate I'm bound for the penitentiary anyway ...

Let's examine Bill Maher's quote more closely: Does it not drain one's motivation to improve life on Earth to believe that the world is going to come to an end? The answer is, yes it does (which is why the Rapture-obsessed Religious Right can suck my dick bone dry). Therefore, since "improving life on Earth" is the religion of every left-wing activist and (legit) Star Trek fan, I'm talking Jihad, here; nothing less than a holy war between leftist activists/Trekkies ...

... and ig-nant-ass motherfuckers who hide from the world (and their responsibilities as citizens) in concrete bunkers filled with canned goods and bottled water.

Nothing in life pisses me off more than a waste of potential -- and I shudder to think of all the time, money and energy that's been WASTED trying to survive The Apocalypse instead of PREVENTING it from happening in the first damn place.

Anyone who "thinks" (note the quotes) that I'm naive; that the Human race can't achieve the kind of utopia Gene Roddenberry depicted needs to have the word HYPOCRITE branded (a tattoo wouldn't be painful enough) onto their foreheads. Why? You can't have it both ways: You can't tell so-called welfare cheats to believe in themselves and pull their Horatio Alger bootstraps ...

... while simultaneously telling me that I can't steer Humanity towards a utopian future. It's suspiciously convenient for the rich/powerful (right-wing) that the poor/oppressed (left-wing) are always told to get spirit-breaking day jobs because supposedly nothing is impossible if you work hard enough ...

... but somehow, no matter how hard I work (and I NEVER take a day off, which is why I'm still single at 40), a bloated, vampiric military-industrial complex will always exist in some form. I watch Rocky movies too -- and the lesson THIS niggah derived from them is that there's ZERO difference between an opponent in a boxing ring ...

... and an elitist living in a MTV Cribs/MC Hammer mansion based on the sales of nuclear missiles (which Obama, our colossally overrated commander-in-chief, has yet to dismantle even though his ass got a Nobel Peace Prize for simply TALKING about disarmament). If anything, the New Agers psychotically fixated on some ancient apocalyptic prophesy need to be concerned about something that can actually destroy the world for real: A nuclear holocaust. But hey, don't take my word for it! Ask the good people of Hiroshima/Nagasaki, Japan -- and keep in mind the nukes we the people dropped in 1945 were NOTHING compared to their modern, more powerful counterparts ...

After 2012, some retarded imbecile will no doubt claim the Mayan Calendar was just a false alarm, but the NEXT planetary alignment or cosmic shift or whatever-the-fuck will be The Big One. Well, the only "big one" they're going to have to worry about is my foot being broken off in their ass. The time, money and energy y'all WASTE preparing for whatever-the-fuck needs to be donated to the peace movement. Beyond Nuclear is a most righteous organization whose mission is as close to cinematic superheroics as real life gets, and they're in desperate need of funds, so help them out. Be a part of the solution, NOT part of the problem.

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I graduated from high school in 1987 -- and during that fateful summer, my grandfather (a lieutenant colonel who fought the Nazis in World War II) heavily pressured me to join the military. I ALMOST did, but instead, I saw Superman IV: The Quest for Peace and the rest is history. Snide, bitchy critics (spoiled white suburbanites, mainly) get off on claiming the film "sucks", but their gratuitous cynicism and anal retentive nitpicking doesn't change the fact that Christopher Reeve (he insisted on co-writing the script, God rest his soul) is singularly responsible for me being a left-winger today.

If one man -- if one anti-war movie -- can make that much of a difference, imagine how much more could be done if you people cared and contributed ..?

SOURCES:
http://www.beyondnuclear.org/
http://www.truemajority.org/bensbbs/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_anti-nuclear_groups
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYulu_Ee2zA&feature=related
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superman_IV:_The_Quest_for_Peace